A Spoken Word Post #59

In general, I wouldn't have responded to a message from some Sketch McSketchinson whom I barely knew.   But one night, upon going to bed I prayed from my heart to God, my guardian angels, and the universe.  Having been in a 20 year marriage and only dated one person since,  my experience is very limited and any type of internet dating/hook-ups are not my thing.

Over the past year and a half, I'd gone to dinner with a few men and was saddened to find that, regardless of social status, income, and profession, there is alot of riff raff going on with middle aged men - that which I didn't care to be a part of.   Having watched my single friends go from one calamity to the next, especially the internet daters, was like opening up a sewer drain into your home and letting all the rats in.  Then you spend the next several years of your life trying to get rid of them.  But in spite of my strategic approach to live life doing what I love (my projects) and hoping that my soul-mate prince would simply show up, the only ones that hopped to my door were toads.


So one night I prayed, asking for a life partner with the character, life passions, and energy that matched mine, and  one who would stand in a crowd of a thousand women and say, "You!  You're the one!"   And... whom it wouldn't creep me out.  I don't remember ending the prayer, but I fell asleep with a hole in my heart that only a true soul mate could fill.  But the answer to that prayer came straight out of left field.

 I woke up the next morning to a voice (not audible) that said very clearly, "You and Scott Carberry would have a blast together!"  I argued back, "Scott Carberry?!?  The freckled kid who sat 'over there' in elementary and junior high school?!"  I was offended that that was all my angels had to offer.  After all, on fb Scott appeared to be a biker and I am petrified of motor cycles and not the chicken-liver you want on the back of your bike.  He lives in Arizona and I in Alabama.  "Not gonna happen!"  But the voice goaded me, "Look again!"  Rather than waste one more ounce of energy on another toad, I threw it back  to the universe and said, "If this is a divine answer, he would have to contact me!"   I went about my way and forgot about it.

Scott took this.  I creeped it off his fb page.  :)

Three days later, I opened  FB and there was the message - seen at the end of the last post - telling me I was beautiful.  I couldn't help being shocked at the coincidence of the timing and, at the advice of a friend, responded.  I also did something else I never do; I facebook creeped him!  And in no pictures was there a motorcycle!  But I did see a bald head and realized that the hats and bandannas are for his fair skin that is no match for the Arizona sun.  I saw some of his projects which mirrored my own interests, and the pictures he posted reflected my own passions and heart.  Who'da thunked it!

Another pic that I creeped from Scott's photos

Over the next few months, our friendship grew via phone, text and fb.   Scott shared his passions for travel, refurbishing projects, cooking, and getting more fit to embark on the second half of our lives.  Although we never mentioned a relationship or talked in any way that would seem like we were more than friends,  he often referred to us in a life-long context and for some reason, that felt very natural.  Our plan was that he would come and visit me during the Christmas holidays and we would tour my area on the Gulf Coast, then the Mississippi Coast, and spend a couple days in New Orleans.  Later I would go see Arizona.

I took this at the Greer's Christmas Party in 2014.

But simultaneous to us talking, he had injured his foot getting out of a pool and it became infected.  Being diabetic, it led to foot surgery and 45 days of  treatments.  I did the math and realized he would not be released to travel.  Scott counted the weekends as part of the 45 days but in reality it was  55 days - right through the holiday season.  He was determined right up to Christmas Eve, when the doctors would not okay him travel.

   He lives in the same general area as his family and when he wasn't spending time with them the week between Christmas and New year's, he was alone and often called at those times.  For me, the invitations offered early on had expired after I declined and the would-be hosts made alternative plans.  So, being that my children were in New York, I spent the holiday season alone - hence my post, "How to Spend Christmas Alone and Not Have it Suck."  But this was the turning point in Scott and my journey together.